AITA for looking for a new job due to time off not being approved?
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Graduation Trip vs. Job: A Nanny’s Dilemma
As a college senior balancing a full-time nanny job, a young woman faces a tough decision when her family plans a once-in-a-lifetime graduation trip. After informing her employer about her upcoming absence, she is met with unexpected concern over childcare arrangements, leaving her to question her commitment to the job. This relatable scenario highlights the struggle many young adults face when trying to prioritize personal milestones against professional responsibilities. Will she choose the trip that celebrates her achievements or risk her job security?
Seeking Feedback on Job Conflict
A 21-year-old college senior at ASU is facing a dilemma regarding her job as a nanny. As she prepares for graduation and upcoming family trips, she is concerned about potential conflicts with her employer. Here’s a breakdown of the situation:
- Current Employment: The individual has been working full-time as a nanny since high school, which has allowed her to balance work with her college schedule.
- New Family: She started working for a family in December, having met the mother through a neighborhood Facebook group. The mother is a part-time nurse who works three days a week and occasionally swaps shifts.
- On-Call Expectations: During the interview, the mother indicated that the nanny would sometimes be on call for childcare needs, which adds to the complexity of scheduling.
As graduation approaches, the nanny has planned a family trip at the end of May, which will last for 11 days. She communicated this to her employer, hoping for understanding. However, the mother expressed concern about childcare during her absence.
- Concerns Raised: The nanny is worried about the mother’s reaction, recalling a previous job where she had to leave due to a family refusing to grant her time off for a funeral.
- Trip Importance: The trip is significant as it is a once-in-a-lifetime graduation celebration, and the dates are fixed due to a timeshare arrangement.
The nanny is now contemplating whether she should continue with this job if her request for time off is not accommodated. She feels that the trip is a priority and is seeking opinions on whether she would be justified in looking for another job if necessary.
- Family Drama: The situation highlights the tension between personal commitments and professional responsibilities, a common theme in family dynamics.
- Conflict Resolution: The nanny is seeking advice on how to navigate this conflict, weighing her options carefully.
- Wedding Tension: While not directly related to weddings, the underlying themes of commitment and obligation resonate with similar family events.
In conclusion, the nanny is reaching out for honest feedback on her situation. She is torn between her commitment to her job and the importance of her family trip, and she wants to know if she is in the wrong for prioritizing her personal plans over her work obligations.
This is Original story from Reddit
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Story
Hellooo. Just wanted to get some feedback on this situation before I go through with a job search and a big old headache. I, a 21-year-old female, am a senior in college at ASU graduating this upcoming spring.
I have worked full-time as a nanny since high school and have found that it is usually convenient for my schedule to work in between classes or on weekends, etc.
I recently started working for a family in December who was seeking a long-term nanny for up to 2 years of work. I met the mother, probably around 35-40 years old, on Facebook in a neighborhood group, who then interviewed me and proceeded to hire me. If you’ve nannied before, you know it’s very common to meet families over Facebook, so no safety concerns there.
During the interview, she mentioned that as a part-time nurse, she works 3 days a week and 1 weekend day per month. She also mentioned that she swaps shifts all the time for more desirable shifts that fit her needs, so sometimes I will sort of be on call for these instances. Needless to say, with graduation and spring trips coming up, I wanted to ensure that I gave her plenty of heads up before agreeing to trips.
I wouldn’t want her to ask me to be on call while I’m out of town. I also would already need the 3 usual days off anyway. With this being said, I mentioned the other day (January 25) that my family planned a trip at the end of May and I would be gone for 11 days.
Her reaction to this was not as I had hoped, and she mentioned she was very worried about what she will be doing about these days as far as childcare goes. I may be overthinking, but I have had to leave a job before due to a family refusing to give me off for a funeral. I just want to get opinions on if, worst-case scenario, I had to look for another job due to not receiving the time off.
I would choose the trip over the job, seeing as my graduation trip would literally come once in my lifetime, and it would suck not being able to go. For context, the trip is set in stone due to it being a timeshare date, and the week we get is the week we get. Please be honest, am I the asshole?!!!!!
View the Original Reddit Post Here
Summary of Reddit Comments
The top Reddit comments reveal a strong consensus around NTA due to the ample notice given for the trip and the expectation of flexibility from the employer. Most users agree that the employer’s rigid stance on time off is unreasonable, especially considering the commenter is a college student with legitimate personal commitments, highlighting the importance of work-life balance.
Overall Verdict
NTA
Expert Advice for Resolving the Conflict
Navigating the delicate balance between personal commitments and professional responsibilities can be challenging, especially in a job like nannying where flexibility is often expected. Here are some practical steps for both the nanny and the employer to consider in resolving this conflict:
For the Nanny
- Communicate Clearly: Schedule a meeting with your employer to discuss your upcoming trip. Be open about your plans and the importance of this trip for you as a graduation celebration.
- Provide Documentation: If possible, share any documentation regarding the trip, such as confirmation of the timeshare reservation, to reinforce the fixed nature of your plans.
- Offer Solutions: Suggest potential solutions to ease the childcare burden during your absence. This could include recommending alternative caregivers or offering to help find someone suitable.
- Set Boundaries: Be clear about your availability moving forward. If the employer cannot accommodate your request, consider whether you are willing to continue in a role that may not respect your personal time.
- Reflect on Your Priorities: Take time to assess what is most important to you. If this trip is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, it may be worth considering other job options that align better with your personal commitments.
For the Employer
- Listen Actively: Approach the conversation with an open mind. Understand that the nanny has communicated her plans well in advance and that her personal commitments are valid.
- Evaluate Flexibility: Consider the possibility of being flexible with the schedule. If the nanny has been reliable and has given ample notice, it may be reasonable to accommodate her request.
- Discuss Alternatives: Engage in a discussion about potential solutions. This could include hiring temporary help or adjusting the schedule to cover the days the nanny will be away.
- Reflect on Expectations: Reassess the expectations set during the hiring process regarding on-call duties. Ensure that both parties have a mutual understanding of flexibility and time off.
- Foster a Supportive Environment: Create a work culture that values work-life balance. A supportive approach can lead to better job satisfaction and loyalty from employees.
Conclusion
Ultimately, both the nanny and the employer should strive for open communication and mutual understanding. By addressing the situation with empathy and a willingness to find common ground, both parties can work towards a resolution that respects personal commitments while maintaining professional responsibilities.
Join the Discussion
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